Friday, July 27, 2012

sufferings of working mothers

The new age professionals-cum-mothers are finding it very difficult to strike a happy balance between their office, husband, children and home. In most cases, kids either get put into day-care centres or stay at home with a fulltime maid or with grandparents. In any of the setting, the kid hardly gets to spend any good time with his/her parents.
This urban culture of partial mother-less childhood has led to many problems in children. Not all the children will have all the problems. Many may have none. But in general, some of the problems that children face are:
1.     slow speech development
2.     learning difficulties due to lack of clarity of concepts
3.     poor self esteem
4.     hyperactivity or lethargy or oscillation between the two
5.     addiction to television
6.     aggressive tendencies
7.     inhibited social relationships
8.     inadequate development of play-methods and creativity 
9.     sexual molestation by care-takers

Work cannot be avoided in many cases. It’s not out of choice, but out of compulsion there. The reason behind such compulsions may differ from person to person.

But it’s a very tricky situation then. Work may induce guilt of neglecting the child. Absence of work may induce the frustration of neglecting the career. Unfortunately there is no ready-made solution for this die-and-die situation. It’s like a tug of war between child and career. Going more deeply, it's a battle between two scary emotions- guilt and frustration. The only thing one may do is choose the lesser of the two evils. If you are the kind of woman who can brave the guilt better, choose career. If you can brave the frustration better, choose the child.

The most important thing you may have to take care of is not letting either of the two emotions get better of you. Guilt shouldn’t affect your work and frustration shouldn’t affect your child.

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